Last Name Thoughts
In less than 3 weeks I must decide on my new last name!?!?
Is it going to be Cheryl Lynn Lim, or Cheryl Lynn Murray-Lim??
Why would I want to keep the Murray in part of name?
Well, the reason is two-fold.
One, I am not chinese! If I ever apply for a job, or if somebody hears my last name without knowing me they will probabely assume that I am chinese. Thus, deciding on only Lim changes my identity!
Two, I'd be keeping the Murray in my name as a remebrance of my Dad who passed away in 2003. My Dad was a very important person to me, and my family in general is important to me. Also, when my mom re-married last July her name became Murray-Weir, to remember dad and also to continue to have the same last name as my sister and I.
In a counter argument, why would I not include the Murray in my name?
Again, for two reasons.
One, I am quite traditional in my views on marriage. Traditionally the last name (and religion) of the man becomes the family name. The two are joined together which means they share everything, including their name. They are a family.
Two, I think some of our family members may be offended if I do not fully adopt the man's last name. And, of course, we never want reasons for family to be angry or offended.
So, needless to say it's a tough decision.
Cheryl Lynn Lim, or Cheryl Lynn Murray-Lim??
If you have any views, or opnions on this issue I'd love to hear them!
Or if you'd like to vote for one choice over the other, please leave a comment!
Is it going to be Cheryl Lynn Lim, or Cheryl Lynn Murray-Lim??
Why would I want to keep the Murray in part of name?
Well, the reason is two-fold.
One, I am not chinese! If I ever apply for a job, or if somebody hears my last name without knowing me they will probabely assume that I am chinese. Thus, deciding on only Lim changes my identity!
Two, I'd be keeping the Murray in my name as a remebrance of my Dad who passed away in 2003. My Dad was a very important person to me, and my family in general is important to me. Also, when my mom re-married last July her name became Murray-Weir, to remember dad and also to continue to have the same last name as my sister and I.
In a counter argument, why would I not include the Murray in my name?
Again, for two reasons.
One, I am quite traditional in my views on marriage. Traditionally the last name (and religion) of the man becomes the family name. The two are joined together which means they share everything, including their name. They are a family.
Two, I think some of our family members may be offended if I do not fully adopt the man's last name. And, of course, we never want reasons for family to be angry or offended.
So, needless to say it's a tough decision.
Cheryl Lynn Lim, or Cheryl Lynn Murray-Lim??
If you have any views, or opnions on this issue I'd love to hear them!
Or if you'd like to vote for one choice over the other, please leave a comment!
posted by Cheryl & Darrell | 12:23 AM
9 Comments:
Hi Cheryl,
We haven't met yet but I'm a friend of Darrell's from Vancouver. My vote is for Cheryl Lynn Murray-Lim because when you say "Cheryl Lynn Lim" out loud it kind of sounds like a tongue twister. That's not a solid answer, but that's my vote. I'm curious to know what you decide. :o)
Murray-Lim seems the most practical for the reasons you mentioned and also wanting to honour your beloved father (and the rest of your immediate family) is lovely. If it was me I would pick that name. At this point in my life I wish I had included my own last name from birth into my name today. Interesting to see what you choose. There is something not quite right sounding in the Lynn Lim combo without the Murray in between. It reminds me of Ling Ling the panda bear, but that is just me.
Actually Lynn Lim is better than what my soon to be married friend's name is going to be: Jody Brody...ouch!
If it were me, there would be absolutely no question in my mind - you honor your husband by taking his name, and you are honoring your dad by keeping his too -- the two men who mean the most to you in your heart. Your dad will be at your wedding in spirit, and how that spirit will rejoice when he sees his daughter, Cheryl Murray-Lim. As your mom did to remember her loving husband, I think it is fitting that you do the same, Cheryl, for a very loving dad :)
Especially since Doug had no boys, it is up to you and/or Tracey to carry on the family line!! Do it!! It's right!! Love ya, Ruth xox
I agree with all of the above, but if for some reason you were going to change your name to just Lim, what is stopping you from having Murray as a second middle name??? Hope you are well, talk to you later.
I agree with the above comment. That way you are carrying on your name but not offending your soon to be family.
my mother got rid of her middle name and just kept her maiden name as her middle name - is there any reason that you're keeping the Lynn? If not, you could just consider becoming Cheryl Murray Lim.
Hi Everyone, to respond to some of your questions,
In my opinion getting rid of "Lynn" would be like getting rid of my first name! A name my parents chose for me. My name is Cheryl Lynn "Last Name".
I suppose I could have Murray as another middle name. hum..?
I am really undecided on this issue and I have to decide soon!
Thus, if anybody has an opnion in the other direction, since most of the comments have been in one direction, it'd be great to hear from you too!
ps. Please select "other" instead of anonymous, it would be great to know whose opinions i'm reading and that its not from some random person off the internet. Thank you.
I think anything but Cheryl Lim just creates chaos down the road. Imagine if you have a daughter, and then her last name becomes Murray-Lim and she marries, wants to honor her family by keeping the last name, and so her name becomes Murray-Lim-Newname. Or if future children are just "Lim" than they don't match up to your last name, which is just as confusing. I'd go for the traditional. And in the case of jobs, you could just insert a pic of yourself into the resume or paperclip it to the application to clear up any confusion if you're concerned. Carrying on the family line is more than a name - it's who you are down to the blood. Changing your name doesn't change that.
Okay, those are my deep thoughts at midnight. :)
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